Practice: Stress Scene Investigator

Jenna Zaffino 

Hi. I'm Jenna. And in this session we are going to become a stress scene investigator and that's just a really fun way to think about how to make sense of all of the sensory information that we're receiving from the outside world in our body, from our inner world within our body, and absolutely in our thoughts within our mind. So to begin, let's find our comfort. Just be in a seated position or standing somewhere that makes you feel supported, and if you have a writing journal utensil, something you can do a little exercise with at the end of the practice, I'll be giving you a little assignment. Please feel free to pause the video if you need more time and come back when you're ready. Now let's talk about this amazing sensory mechanism that is our body. It has this unique ability to receive information from the outside world, certainly from our inner world in terms of what's going on in our organs and with our stress and then also within our mental world and our emotional world, what's going on in our minds. 

This information is very important. It tells us where we are in space, how to move forward, whether an environment is safe or not, whether a person or people are safe or not and certainly helps us try to make sense of oftentimes very quick decision making that we need to make sense of throughout our days. It's a lot of information and in this age we've got all of that sensory information, plus the information coming at us from the Internet and all of our devices, plus the information that is needed to help you manage your lung disease and then anything else that happens within your day, whether it is work, home, relationships, etcetera. It's a lot to navigate through and it's very easy in this day day and age to become overwhelmed by the information overload. Sometimes when we have too much going on, it can be hard to discern or make sense of the sensory information or the thought information that's happening within our bodies. And one of the things that can help us make sense of these signals is our ability to ask questions. So let's take an example. Perhaps you're going about your day and you decide to take a social media break. 

You start to scroll on your phone and suddenly you find yourself feeling a sense of stress or even anger. You know what it feels like in your own body, maybe it's heat or constriction in your chest, tightening of your jaw, furrowing of your brow, maybe it's a headache, maybe it's a feeling that the room is getting a little smaller. There's definitely a signal there and that signal can feel unsafe. Now the great thing about our bodies is that they're designed to help us determine whether something is unsafe or not. However, when it comes to social media versus maybe being charged by a wild animal, those two things are very different. And in this day and age, when we have lots information and different stressors coming towards us, it helps us to really unpack what's happening in the moment. The first step for us is to recognize the way that our body responds to stress and you probably already have a little bit of an inkling as to what that looks like for you. Common stress responses are a quickening heart rate, maybe a shortening of breath, perhaps a little bit of gut discomfort in your stomach, maybe muscle tension often around the neck or shoulders, the jaw as I mentioned, perhaps a headache and certainly that sense that the world is getting pretty small because you're kind of focused in and all of these sensations are helping us get into our stress response which is categorized as our ability to fight, flight, freeze and also fawn, which is our people pleasing tendencies. 

So if we can recognize that we are experiencing stress, often we can give ourselves the ability to pause and investigate the stressor by asking the following question. What does this Patient, stress, heart rate, whatever it is for you, what does this experience, what does this sensation want me to know? And then the key is to stop and listen because that's where the good storyteller of our brain in our mind can start to answer the question. I also find it helpful to identify this is stress as opposed to saying I am stressed when you feel those signals being able to say this is stress what does the stress want me to know When you can give yourself more information about what's actually happening, you can often make a better decision about your next steps. In the example we spoke about, maybe it's just, hey, I guess social media is not the best choice for me today. I'm gonna put that down. Maybe you're in your doctor's office and you're feeling stressed and you can communicate the way that we're talking about this information is causing me to have a stress response. Is there a different way that we can approach this? So it feels a little bit more hopeful and a little more informative. If you're in a relationship or in a conversation, perhaps you can express, hey, the way that we're talking about this subject is feeling a little stressful for me. 

I'm wondering what you really want me to know. And these questions can be really helpful in mitigating your stress but also giving you a second to then bring in a stress cycle completion strategy. So our first step was to identify the stress, feeling it in our sensations, knowing what it is for us. Our and step was to ask a question. What does this stress want me to know? And then our 3rd step, if we can get here, is to try to complete our stress cycle with a behavior that can be helpful in just allowing us to down regulate or move through the stress. For some of you, it's going to be slower breathing. For some of you it's going to be something physical. Sometimes it can be something that solicits a bit of oxytocin like petting your dog or receiving and giving a hug or a kiss. 

There's a lot of different strategies that can help you complete your stress cycle. The goal is to choose something that you know will work for you. Whenever I talk to people across the board, there are people who know they have to get very physical. They have to pound their feet or scream into a pillow or something like that. And then there are people who know they need to get quiet, they need to slow down their breathing, they need to move through it. Now when you're in a better regulated state after you've taken a pause to figure out what is the cause of your stress and you've gotten some information about what that stress wants you to know. Now you can move forward and make an informed decision about, for example, whether you need to be on social media as much as you do or maybe how you need to communicate to someone else. So our journal question for right now is to consider a time in the recent past where you may have felt stressed. 

Often, I use the example of traffic because I'm in the city of Chicago and the traffic is horrible here, and there's never not a commute that doesn't involve being cut off or, you know, just having to be very hypervigilant. In these moments of simple stressors, you can recall how that stress landed in your body. Write down the stressor and then write down the sensation you experienced whether it's a number of sensations or just one particular feeling that you knew was there. Once you've written down those pieces of information, write down the question, what does this sensation want me to know? And then do the best you can to free-write your answer and that means no editing, no thinking about it consciously or logically, just write whatever comes to mind out on the page. Chances are that stress was being informed by maybe one other situation or maybe multiple other elements, and it just so happened that that traffic moment was the thing that set you off. Now, in reality, the traffic moment logically isn't that dramatic or dangerous in the moment. It's the idea that we're helping our brain understand different levels of stress so it doesn't react to every single stressor as the most dangerous thing that's happening in your world right now. What's more, in an age of setting boundaries, which is a healthy thing to do, I find that some people want to throw up a brick wall right in front of a stressor so they never have to deal with it anymore. 

Now while this can be a temporary good strategy, what it doesn't do is deal directly with the way that you're managing or navigating through your stressor. A better strategy is to ask the question, find out what that stress wants you to know, and then inform the boundary you wish to set with the information that you have. So in the example of traffic, perhaps that stress wants you to know that you need a few moments to just relax before you start driving. And maybe that means that you need to adjust your morning schedule to allow for a few more sips of coffee or a few more moments of just peace before you leave the house. In that way, you're setting a boundary around your time that hopefully will better inform your ability to navigate through traffic. There's a lot of different ways to use this question, but the most important thing that you take away from this session is to use it as a means of pausing, giving yourself a chance to complete your stress cycle, and also informing your next steps in a way that is in better service to you and your life and your happiness and health overall. So after you've completed your journal exercise look and see if there's any common themes that might feel familiar to you, like, oh, I always feel this way or this is and I felt before. And just give them a circle so that you're aware that they are there. 

In the week ahead for your weaving well-being tip, I'd like to encourage you to put this tool to use whenever you feel your stress response coming up. What I truly hope for you is that this tool becomes as meaningful and useful for you as it has been for me. It's such a simple way of giving ourselves a little more space to think and process what's actually happening in our body and what's actually happening in our lives. And when you have that information you can become unstoppable in the way you care for yourself moving forward through your day, through your week, and through your life as a whole. So remember, you are strong and resilient and these small moments really do matter. I'll see you soon.